The Best of Lego Fest

Another day without Jordan weighing us down…I’m beginning to think we don’t need her; little independent Women as what we are. More to the point; I’m beginning to worry that she doesn’t need us. Either that or she just enjoys a little break from the terrible twosome love/hate’ing each other 24/7. On second thoughts…take me with you Jo!!!

So yeah, Jordan’s off to another competition, leaving us to fend for ourselves against the perilous onslaught of LEGO fans intent on visiting Lego Mecca for the ‘Lego Festival 2025’. Couldn’t really find a lot about this festival online…so here’s where my mind went; Lego Woodstock…spaced out children everywhere building Mini Figs in a circle sampling some of the ‘imported’ il-Lego-al substances (we’ve all seen the botanical sets), ‘Thunder Brickz’ hitting the stage hammering out classic brick themed bangers as the cult Mini Figurehead spouts their message of LEGO Pieces and Love. Absolute scenes…well; maybe not, but who the hell knows…these Lego folks are a bit crazy; have you seen the cost on Lego these days??

Shockingly, we manage to leave on time and head to the land of Lego at record pace…wait are we on time? Guess we know who the problem is ey? Mind you, I think I may have been fuelled by the continual chorus of ‘Are we there yet?’. Yes Grayson, the more you ask, the faster we go…maybe the F1 should invest in a pair of nagging children; I’ve never wanted to get to my destination faster…*waits in anticipation of a speeding ticket after reaching Delorian speed to silence Grayson*…Lego? Where we’re going we don’t need Lego!!

We do need snacks though…luckily I packed a backpack full of snacky snacks; gave me some respite I guess…*breathe, eat, are we there yet?, repeat*. By the time we made it to our destination, the van looked like the Cookie Monster had been on a post munchie binge.

“Are we there yet?”…no Gray, everywhere in Windsor is adorned in Lego…snooty bastards. OF COURSE WE ARE HERE!!! Honestly, there is no one more happy than I; well aside from the other road users I guess.

So yeah…incase you haven’t clicked…we’re at LEGOLAND!!! I’d been threatening to come here for weeks, but keep putting it off on account of me spending every last penny to fund trips to America and Europe…oh, and the fact that I think Legoland ain’t too great; mass crowds, long waits and in need of some serious TLC. So yeah, Legoland for a Lego Festival!!! Should be pretty chilled right? Well…

Pretty good vibe to be fair. Sun is shining, music is pumping, there are droves of touts at the gates; proper festival atmosphere. Despite this…we’re all ready for a fun filled day at the fest.

We were greeted at the main entrance by some festival staff handing out souvenir lanyards to the kids (I know, I was gutted when they didn’t give me one), with a map of the festival zones and some fun activities. This festival looks great; split into 5 zones around Creativity, Dance, Music, Gaming and “Chill”, with loads of cool things to do in each. Hmmm…not quite what I pictured; probably a little more family friendly too…though there was a Battle of the Bands; what band doesn’t love being judged inadequate ey?

Festival time!!! Down the myriad of slides (no I didn’t this time…I’m disappointed in myself too), and through Tiny World (Miniland Grayson, it’s called Miniland!) and on to our first zone…

First stop on the tour; The Creative zone. Oh ok, this looks fun…ooo, build your own minifigure cookie heads? That looks great, always looking at new ways to waste money. ‘Please can we do it Dad?’ £7 a cookie??!! Absol-fucking-lutely…not! Sorry kids, I know it would turn into a shower of shit and I’d just be fuming when the icing melted in the sun. Sorry guys, go partake in the free activities and unleash your creativity!!! This was fun mind, every zone had an interactive area that you could build something and add it to a mass building project; child labour? Illegal? No, not in Legoland. The creative zone had a city…the city had 2 new strange buildings. Nice one kids…what is this?? A CENTRE FOR ANTS??!! (If you get that reference…award yourself 10 points).

Following the kids brief stint in architecture, we headed across to the next zone to continue our creative journey. The Dance Zone!!! The fee to enter? Bust a move!!! Alaska breaks into her signature splits (honestly, whenever there’s a dance segment, a bum wiggle followed by the splits…it’s her signature move), and Grayson worms his way in whilst I wowed the crowds with a floss. The crowd went wild as we are granted entry and crowned kings (and queen) of the Dance Zone. We are given passes for life and honorary entry to the Lego Fest hall of fame…previously only populated by Peely the Banana and Hopsy the Bunny; some truly amazing company. Well…either that happened, or the strange green leaf shaped Lego everyone was smoking went to my head. Anyways…we’re here, and time to partake in a little snacky snack of my own, something right up my alley…rainbow popcorn…in a souvenir popcorn bucket. SOLD!!! When I say I ate my body weight in popcorn…I am not exaggerating; there were unlimited refills until my tenth refill in the space of 10 minutes…ooops.

Cool activity here mind…bugger all to do with dance, but we created a tile each to add to a giant Lego mosaic. This was fun, but way too much pressure to get the correct coloured tiles…especially when Alaska was using her creative flair to fuck it up. Nice one, looks great. Mosaic messed up (I kid, we were integral tiles in the mosaic), we chilled on the lawn before DJ Goodvibes hit the stage.

Speaking of which…smoke, fire, lights, tunes…TIME TO DANCE!!! Alaska wasted no time in throwing her best moves and had an absolute incredible time. Honestly, nothing makes me smile wider than seeing the kids having an amazing time and just enjoying themselves. Grayson on the other hand…well, he’s a self conscious 7 year old; The two different Fletcher kids. Bugger it, you stay here eating rainbow popcorn (god knows I need to stop), I’m joining Nij for a dance!!! Lots of fun, but I’m knackered now…

Quick popcorn refill later and we’re off like little Hobbits on our journey. The Gaming Zone next up, and time to do that usual Gamer thing…making Lego sushi and adding new structures to Nana city. Hmmm, I kinda assumed we’d be playing games, but yeah, creating Alaskas decorative Prawn flower sushi was fun; didn’t taste great though, and kinda hurt my teeth. No idea what that has to do with gaming; maybe a jigsaw type of game, but not what I expected outside of the ‘Saw’ franchise. Next up…walking barefoot on shards of Lego.

Aside from the borderline weird Lego torture, Grayson proudly built some Banana themed houses to add to Nana Village (apparently it’s a Fortnite thing; nothing makes me feel older than not knowing what the hell was going on here), and Alaska added what was left of her weird sushi creation as a form of sustenance to the townspeople.

Aaaaaannnnd finally, some Games…’Lego freeze’ and some low jeopardy squid game where Grayson had to dance or suffer the consequences…”GET OFF THE CARPET!!!” Fucking hell, chill out mate, the kids are just having fun and trying to avoid the creepy Lego ‘red light, green light’ for fear of death.

Luckily the kids avoid a serious maiming…other kids; not so lucky…I did wonder why we all had to sign waivers before partaking. As a reward…Peely!! Wait, who?

Some banana shaped Fortnite-mare hits the stage to thank the kids for hours of child labour creating new structures for Nana city. Fights ensue, but we manage to get through the masses and get a half decent picture. Everyone say…”BANANAS!!!”. “Hey that’s offensive”…oh fuck off Peely!!

Needing a break from being all creative and stuff, and following a Grayson pee run that I’m certain set a new 100m record (must be the Peely excitement), we headed to Ninjago. Yep…time to give our wanky arms a workout on one of the least fun attractions in a UK theme park (trust me…and I’ve been on Gangtsa Granny: The Ride). Theming is great, and it’s cool to have a different type of ride in the UK, but I always end up flailing my arms around like a madman and getting fuck all points for trying. No it’s not just me being bitter for losing to Grayson…Badly. Speaking of which, should I be worried that Grayson absolutely battered me in this? Better watch out Dean, he can fight off Lego ninjas with easy…your little noodle arms won’t protect you from his onslaught. He is great at this ride though…fair play; not that he let me forgot about it for the rest of the day…”Dad tell everyone how much I beat you”. Guys…Grayson battered me more than a chocolate bar in a chip shop in Edinburgh. There…are you happy now Grayson??!

Enough of this…I’m off back to the Festival. Next few zones led us to Heartlake City. Battle of the Bands stage set up in the Music zone, but as usual, the band were being divas and only showing up 3 times a day; cop outs!! Ok…we’ll be back.

Chill Out Zone it is then…let’s build some flowers. Wait? Grayson, why is your flower so good? Alaska…yours are great too. My flower looks like a pile a blue and yellow shit. Well…I did get a compliment from Hopsy though. In your face kids!! This was a really fun zone too, we had loads of fun making Lego flowers and adding them to the collective creative topiary display…well, until Grayson got jealous and decided to ‘accidentally’ destroy my flower. Cheers kid. We chilled at the back of the zone in the beanbags for a bit whilst Gray and Alaska used the beanbags as trampolines. Not quite how it works kids…best move on before we are kicked out.

Finishing off in the Music zone, the creative task; pass build to get backstage. Backstage? Ooo exciting; Thunda Brickz…here we come!!! Kinda fun activity; even if Grayson did build a pass with ‘a guy with a P burned into his face’. Ummm…I’m lost for words; I worry about you kid.

Thankfully Graysons weird assed pass was accepted (along with Alaskas much more ‘normal’ build), and we gained entry to the Battle of the Bands. Probably should say…the Battle did not actually require passes…this was just some Lego themed fun that unusually managed to assess the psychological frailties of your children.

Where are Thunda Brickz?? The Battle of the Bands was off to a bad start as half the Battlers go AWOL. Fuck this…let’s get Buried in Alaska!! (I did manage to win all of 1 BOTB throughout my 12 years or so in a band; no biggie). Brickz in Harmony (you know they’re edgy when then have a ‘z’ instead of an ‘s’) sub in and take to the stage before the real act turn up. A blood fuelled rivalry follows where the crowd are forced to engage in bloodlust and pick a side…the losers destined to be deconstructed; come on guys…this is a bit harsh for a family park. Just form a mega band. Oh…cool. Alaska was gutted. Pretty good show mind…catchy as hell tunes.

Time for one last ride. Grayson cons Alaska into visiting Lego Mythica and boarding the Sky Lion for ‘Soarin’ around Mythica’, chased by the ‘Dick Fire Dragon’. Pretty sure that’s not what it’s called kids…though you’re pretty accurate. Yep, Alaska is finally tall enough to ride so we jumped aboard Maximus. Great ride, lots of fun and Gray and Alaska bloody loved it…despite near fatality at the hands of Lego.

Bloody hell…where has the time gone??!! Time to make our way back up the hill; this was made even more fun having a tearful Grayson trailing behind me and Alaska…fuming that we’d run out of time. Sorry kid…shouldn’t have spent so much time fucking up beanbags in the Chill Out Zone; you’ve only yourself to blame really.

Grayson finally snaps out of it in time to pick up a few cheeky free haribos for completing the festival before we head to the longest line of the day…the gift shop. Seriously…waited longer to get in her than we did for Ninjago…madness. Escaped with nothing to show (the kids were reasonable…I think they must be broken), and then headed back to the van for the long journey home.

Conned into Burger King by Grayson, chased with Sausage Rolls for dessert; no Alaska, you can’t have Sausage Rolls for dessert…she settled for a Corned Beef Bake instead don’t worry.

We had a surprisingly amazing day out. The weather was great, Lego Festival 2025 was so much fun. We had such a good time doing the activities in each zone, taking our time and just having a lovely family day out. Nothing makes me happier than having fun with my amazing kids; making memories (I’ll ignore the random tantrums they both had though…memory erased).

Would really recommend getting to the Festival…best time I’ve ever had in Legoland; so much fun.